A parent’s perspective on Fumble’s Youth Manifesto

Here Deirdre, a mother of two young children, explains why she’s backing Fumble’s Youth Manifesto

Imagine this: you’re having a mooch around YouTube, and you notice ‘ladyes with no clothes on’ as a suggested search. You know it wasn’t your partner because his spelling is pretty good, so it’s more than likely one of your children. This happened to me when my son was eight years old, and it got me thinking – what would have come up if he had googled those words?

I asked my son about his search, and I did a bit of research to see what was out there. As I suspected, there were a lot of good websites providing advice for parents. What I wanted was a website that I could refer my son to, though, but I couldn’t find much.

That’s when I came across Fumble. Finally, a website providing well-researched information on relationships and sex aimed specifically at 11-25-year-olds. They seemed to really understand the issues young people face today – and their website was educational for me, too.

A new, digital age

I feel like the world my children are growing up in is more complex than the one I grew up in. I didn’t have the internet or social media when I was a teenager. How can I guide them when I don’t really have a solid understanding of what they will face?

Young people are much more savvy at using online tools to find out what they need to know. But this also worries me, because one search term could take them down a dark and disturbing rabbit hole exposing them to content that they are just not emotionally mature enough to view.

A recent survey by Fumble, of 200 young people aged 11-25 living in the UK, found that 92% go online to ask questions about relationships, sex and wellbeing, with 89% using a search engine. Young people going online to ask their questions is not surprising. But this is why making it easier to find healthy and trustworthy information is important.

Based on this research, which also asked young people to share issues they had and changes they want to see in the online world, Fumble has created a Youth Manifesto with four clear goals. Young people want:

A happy, healthy place online for sex education
Inclusive sex education
To be involved in the creation of sex education content
Their parents and carers to be educated on the online world and what they face

Helping young people navigate the world today

As a sexual assault survivor and a parent of two young children, I want to help my children navigate the tricky terrain of relationships and sex. I want my children to understand what healthy relationships look like. I want them to understand the language of consent. I want them to have the space and confidence to explore their gender identity. I don’t want porn to be my children’s first experience of sex, and for it to shape their expectations. My daughter is also neurodivergent and I want her to be able to easily find content on relationships and sex, written by other neurodivergent people who understand her reality.

This is why I’m backing Fumble’s Youth Manifesto. I want my kids to learn about relationships and sex safely without being exposed to unwanted sexually explicit content. I want them to have a space where they can ask difficult or embarrassing questions free from judgement.

This world is possible, and Fumble’s manifesto is a first step to get us there.