Lube

Corrie Clapsaddle pleasure, sexual intimacy

Lube is crucial for safe and pleasurable sex – so check out our handy lube guide

When I was at college I worked part-time at an adult store, selling lingerie and sex toys. I applied for the position because I wanted to help people become more comfortable with themselves and their bodies, as well as answer any questions they were too embarrassed to ask their friends. And a lot of those questions were about lube.

This is good – lube is important! It plays a crucial role in making sex safer. By reducing friction, it reduces the chance of injury during sex. When using condoms, lube means they’re less likely to break or fall off, which increases your protection against unplanned pregnancy and STIs. But it’s not just about safety, lube also enhances pleasure and can make personal playtime even more fun!

So why aren’t we all using it?

Even though most people know it’s associated with sex, many don’t actually think to use it – especially people with vaginas. There is still a prominent social stigma against women and people with vaginas using lube – because it’s believed if they need to use lube during sex, it means there is something wrong with them, or their partner is not doing a good enough job at getting them aroused.

Sex educator Kate McCombs explained to Mic, “They erroneously assume that vaginal lubrication is in direct proportion to someone’s arousal. This isn’t always the case. Someone with a vagina can be super turned on, but not super wet. It’s not always linear.”

Here’s Hannah Witton with more thoughts on sexual discomfort and lube:

Anyone can use lube, regardless of their gender identity, sexuality or age. It can also be used for different types of sex (vaginal, anal and oral), as well as masturbation. It’s particularly important for anal sex because the anus doesn’t produce natural lubrication. Using lube means there’s less chance of irritation and tears, which can be really painful.

What kind of lube should I be using?

There are several different types of lube, all with their own pros and cons, so here are some quick guidelines to help you decide what will work for you.

Water-based

PROS: This type of lube is safe to use with condoms and toys, easily washes off and is usually inexpensive.

CONS: Water-based lubes dry out quickly as they absorb into the skin and need to be reapplied more often.

Silicone-based

PROS: This type of lube is very slick, waterproof, long lasting, and safe to use with latex condoms.

CONS: Silicone-based lubes will break down the material of silicone sex toys and cause permanent damage. Depending on the brand, they can also be more expensive compared to water-based.

Oil-based

PROS: This type of lube has a thicker consistency and is the longest-lasting.

CONS: Oil-based lubes are NOT SAFE to use with latex condoms because they make the material porous, which increases the risk of infection and can cause the condom to tear.

Flavoured

PROS: This type of lube is great for oral sex and comes in a variety of flavours.

CONS: Flavoured lubes can contain sugar which can lead to yeast infections, so double check before slapping some onto sensitive genital areas!

Natural

PROS: This type of lube is available for individuals who are allergic to ingredients that can be found in water-based or silicone-based lubes.

CONS: Natural lubes may require the use of a specific type of condom.

Warming and cooling

PROS: This type of lube can be fun to experiment with for new sensations.

CONS: Warming and cooling lubes should be tested before applying to skin, as they can sometimes lead to discomfort and some may not be suitable for use near the anal area.

But before you go diving in for some sexy fun!

Remember these two important warnings:

DO NOT use substances that are not sexual lubricants as lube. Vaseline, baby oil, and anything else similar can all break down condoms. They also contain chemicals that are not meant to go inside your body.

DO NOT use spit as lube: If the person has an STI in their mouth or throat, they can pass it onto you through their saliva.

With that in mind, go try out some lubes if you haven’t before and see which ones you like best!